A sense of Loss

It’s a shame when you experience a sense of loss. Even though its part and parcel of life, it’s still hard to swallow when it happens. Some you can control, some you can’t and some you simply don’t want to.

Sam’s family held a funeral for his grandfather a few days ago. We can’t be there physically but our thoughts are with them in spirit.

I’m losing friends whom I have grown up with simply because we have drifted apart and despite one’s best efforts to reconnect, it’s clear I am the only one that values our friendship. With that, there’s always an accompanying sense of self criticism- could I have done more? Where did it go wrong? At times like this, it’s difficult not to take it personally.

Just coming back from intense weeks of business traveling and losing the drive to pick up the motivation to start it all over again. So I find myself more often pacing the streets instead of diving into new projects, avoiding the workload I know will happen the minute I open that can of worms. But sitting down, doing shallow work is not meant for me and yet, I can’t find the energy to dive back into a hectic work schedule.

It’s easy for someone else to slap you and say just get out of it and start doing small things but I wonder, I wonder if my inertia is from something far more deep-rooted than this. It is in fact my busy schedule and my social distractions that have been preventing me from probing and now, this is the time for some serious introspection.

Yay. Can’t. Wait.